Kyle and I are not currently at the zoo meeting our other stay-at-home mommies and babies. Right – those babies don’t have jobs, either. We are homebound today because I am sick yet again. AARGH!

Therefore I will commit to writing an update and posting some adorable pictures. I know a lot of you don’t even read the posts – you simply log on for a cheap thrill of cuteness, then you leave with nary a glance at the story behind the image. I confess, I am guilty of this when reading Us Weekly or People. All I really want to see is cellulite on Britney Spears’ ass. All YOU really want to see is this:

This is Kyle in the walker that Grandma Bettie bought for him before we arrived in the great southern state of Louisiana. Despite my husband’s PhD in mechanical engineering, I was the one who assembled this delightful toy. Kyle enjoyed chewing on the tray toys, but he couldn’t quite master the walking part. He was able to scooch backwards all the way across and room and dead-end at a wall or piece of furniture, at which point he would look up quizzically and commence whining.

A digression: one of the great things, and there are not that many, about Dish Network is the plethora and variety of music stations. A friend recently opened my eyes to the wonder that is the Kids Stuff channel. But I can only listen to so many renditions of The Wheels on the Bus before I go insane and look for 90′s Grunge Rock. Yesterday I found the Holiday Music channel, and that is what plays in the background right now. And I am curious: why is “My Favorite Things” a holiday song? Was it Christmas time in The Sound of Music (which, to my horror, is being remade) when they sang that song? I don’t think so, but I have mommy brain, which has erased most of my memory.

Anyway. On to some more cuteness.

Above is a picture of my son trying to crawl. I know it just looks like tummy time but it is merely a stage in a complicated transportation system. Over the last week he has developed a unique method of getting from point A to point B. We call it “The Inchworm.” He gets up on all fours, advances a half-step, then flops down on his belly. Repeat. He throws in a roll or two, then when he gets close to the destination which is usually a toy or a beer bottle cap or a sharp staple or a clump of dog hair, he STRETCHES his entire body so that his fingertips are brushing the object. If he can’t grab it at that point, he will sometimes advance some more, and sometimes he will give up in frustration and wail. Other times he will simply stay up on all fours, rocking back and forth, and shriek his happy little joy-scream. It is not yet necessary to follow him 24/7, because he hasn’t gathered much speed, but yesterday morning he almost rolled down the little step from our living room into the Room Which Has No Name when Stewart wasn’t looking. Yikes.

My family will probably complain because this picture is a repeat from a privately-released collection. Oh well. It has sufficient cuteness to make this post, so be it. This is one of the mornings during our Thanksgiving weekend. Kyle slept in a playpen during the night but when he woke up too early in the morning we just gathered him into bed with us, which is becoming a bad habit, but look how cute!!! He sleeps so well, but I can’t sleep at all with his kicking me in the back or bladder, his scooching, and my constant worry that I or my husband will smother him. Which, if you were paying attention, was one of the first admonitions I received from the hospital staff after giving birth to him.

And yes, that is a big, bad TATTOO on Stewart’s right bicep. In fact, there are two, but the other is concealed by his t-shirt. One is an eagle and one is the Harley Davidson logo. In a previous life Stewart was a bad-ass biker who built his own motorcycle and attempted to ride cross-country but the bike broke down and he wound up mooching bologna sandwiches off kind strangers at rest stops as he made his way back home. This was before I knew him, because naturally I would not date such a person. I hate bologna.

Hmm, what else? Oh, my announcement. Kyle and I are going back to my parents’ house in CT a tad bit early this year, because my dear grandfather is sick and in the hospital, and, well, it’s not like I have a job or anything, and my husband is gracious enough to be parted with his son for three weeks. That makes me feel sad, but we’re going to set up a webcam and we’ll talk every day and I promise Kyle won’t forget his daddy. Oh yeah, Stewart will miss ME, too, but this isn’t the longest we’ve been apart.

And now for the cuteness assault:

More later.

Oh internet, how will I live without you?

I depart in the wee hour of tomorrow morning for lands unwired, unconnected to your sweet panes of procrastination and daydreaming. I will be far from the ability to read you, to write to you, to browse your poignant idiocy and bad news. I will be separated from my friends, both known and unknown, for 5 long and empty days.

How, HOW WILL I SURVIVE?

I will make my son entertain me. And I will save up stories to tell you – I know, I owe you big time.

Welcoming Kyle into “The Family” 

Right now my hands smell like Freshly Washed Baby. I want to smell them and smell them. I know that sounds kind of gross, but really, it’s quite charming.