Yesterday Kyle and I had lunch with a good friend. A single friend. A child-free friend. I met her at her office at a big movie company. She throws great big parties with superstars and lots of press. She is superfabulous and she looked fantastic. I showed up wearing spit-up and poo. (Not really, but that’s how I felt in comparison.)
We walked a block to a little Italian deli that has outdoor seating, and she held the door for me and my SUV-like stroller. She told me how annoyed she gets when she sees people ignoring mothers and their strollers struggling to get through doors, and asked if that had ever happened to me. I honestly couldn’t recall such an occasion, because I’ve become pretty self-reliant during outings with Kyle and all of his trappings. We travel pretty light – baby, stroller, and diaper bag only – and I have a special maneuver to get the whole mess through doors. It works.
HOWEVER…
Today we went to Starbucks before Gymboree class because they were giving away free ice cream samples (a quarter cup of chocolatey, coffee-y goodness). I pushed the stroller up to the front door and moved to open it, and SOME WOMAN jumped in front of us, started to open the door, and then STOPPED and called out to a friend she was obviously meeting. She lingered there in front of the unopened door, completely ignoring me and my behemoth stroller waiting impatiently behind her, and then WALKED AWAY. Beeyatch, I thought. Free ice cream made me a more tolerant citizen than I normally am, and instead of ramming her with the stroller I just walked into the store.
I guess I thought that, like being pregnant, being a mother of a new baby gives you a Be Nice To Me, Free pass. When I was pregnant, strangers opened doors, held elevators, helped me with heavy-looking items. And mostly, when people see me with Kyle, they are usually quite nice. So I am surprised when I come across people who not only don’t care, but they approach me with open hostility because I am a new mother. Knowing that people like that do exist (I must confess I have been that single woman who is really annoyed by the crying baby on the airplane) I have been ready to confront anyone who gives me shit. It’s hard enough taking care of the baby and getting us out the door – I definitely don’t need any more than my fair share of asshole today, thank you very much.
So when I was faced with one more helping of asshole one day, I let it loose. It was a few weeks ago, after Mommy Group. Fresh from the high of commiserating with the other moms, I stopped at the post office to mail a package. The whole routine – get out of the car, get stroller out of the trunk (the darn thing is heavy, and it better give me some guns), get baby in car seat out of the car and attach him to stroller, put diaper bag under stroller, close and lock all doors, get going. Then reverse when we get back into the car. Well, while I was doing this, some jerk pulls up into the space next to us, which happened to be a handicapped space. I didn’t see a handicapped placard anywhere on his car, so it annoyed me that he pulled into the space pretty close to the stroller which I had positioned next to my car’s rear door.
So the guy got out of his car, looked pissed, and said “That’s a bad place to put a baby.” Note, this guy, in a handicapped space, got out of his car and stood up and said this to me. So I asked him to explain. He pointed out, in his good Samaritan way, that I should not have left the stroller so close to the handicapped spot. So I pointed out, in my sweetest of tones (read: bitchy), that he was not handicapped. Then we got into a battle of semantics and placard placements that was not becoming to a beaming new mother. I believe I even used the A-word.
First of all, he wasn’t handicapped. And unless he was a UCLA football player with a bogus placard, he had no business getting into MY business, because I wasn’t even blocking the space. And secondly, couldn’t an able-bodied, normal driver wait THIRTY SECONDS for me to get my stroller out of the way so he could park in peace without coming dangerously close to me and my baby?
I think it was the first case of Parking Lot Rage. Or just plain Asshole Rage. I can’t believe we let people like that exist. Yeah, yeah, I know, it’s what makes America a free and wonderful country. But gimme a break, I have a BABY WITH ME! Have some balls, man.
What an asshole. And go you for confronting him!
It’s clear that his handicap is mental.
What an asshole. And go you for confronting him!
It’s clear that his handicap is mental.
What an asshole. And go you for confronting him!
It’s clear that his handicap is mental.
I second Suburbia–and people just suck ass sometimes.
I always have a nice little fantasy/daydream that those losers have completely miserable lives and are suffering the emotional and spiritual torment of the damned.
Not that I think about it much, or anything!
I second Suburbia–and people just suck ass sometimes.
I always have a nice little fantasy/daydream that those losers have completely miserable lives and are suffering the emotional and spiritual torment of the damned.
Not that I think about it much, or anything!
I second Suburbia–and people just suck ass sometimes.
I always have a nice little fantasy/daydream that those losers have completely miserable lives and are suffering the emotional and spiritual torment of the damned.
Not that I think about it much, or anything!
Yeah!!! Good for you!
Yeah!!! Good for you!
Yeah!!! Good for you!
You go girl!
You go girl!
You go girl!
I hear ya girlfriend!! My experience as a pregnant lady and new mom is that MOSTLY people are nice, hold the door for you, help you with heavy packages, coo over your cute baby, etc. But not always. And it pisses me off too. When I was VERY pregnant and moving VERY slowly one day at Wal-Mart some old lady was annoyed and kept bumping into me with her shopping cart. I said LOUDLY to my husband, “Boy, some people will just run a pregant lady right over!” HA – I think pregnancy hormones give you a license to speak your mind where you might normally hold your tongue! Couple of weeks ago I was doing the reverse of your stroller-diaperbag-baby routine, loading my little one in her car seat after an outing to the library. Some OLD CROTCHETY MAN had THE NERVE to roll down his window and YELL at me to “Hurry up, would you?” because he wanted my parking space. I said nothing. Did not look at him. Did not speak. Did not hurry.
I hear ya girlfriend!! My experience as a pregnant lady and new mom is that MOSTLY people are nice, hold the door for you, help you with heavy packages, coo over your cute baby, etc. But not always. And it pisses me off too. When I was VERY pregnant and moving VERY slowly one day at Wal-Mart some old lady was annoyed and kept bumping into me with her shopping cart. I said LOUDLY to my husband, “Boy, some people will just run a pregant lady right over!” HA – I think pregnancy hormones give you a license to speak your mind where you might normally hold your tongue! Couple of weeks ago I was doing the reverse of your stroller-diaperbag-baby routine, loading my little one in her car seat after an outing to the library. Some OLD CROTCHETY MAN had THE NERVE to roll down his window and YELL at me to “Hurry up, would you?” because he wanted my parking space. I said nothing. Did not look at him. Did not speak. Did not hurry.
I hear ya girlfriend!! My experience as a pregnant lady and new mom is that MOSTLY people are nice, hold the door for you, help you with heavy packages, coo over your cute baby, etc. But not always. And it pisses me off too. When I was VERY pregnant and moving VERY slowly one day at Wal-Mart some old lady was annoyed and kept bumping into me with her shopping cart. I said LOUDLY to my husband, “Boy, some people will just run a pregant lady right over!” HA – I think pregnancy hormones give you a license to speak your mind where you might normally hold your tongue! Couple of weeks ago I was doing the reverse of your stroller-diaperbag-baby routine, loading my little one in her car seat after an outing to the library. Some OLD CROTCHETY MAN had THE NERVE to roll down his window and YELL at me to “Hurry up, would you?” because he wanted my parking space. I said nothing. Did not look at him. Did not speak. Did not hurry.