House of PITA
*PITA = Pain In The Ass
Life Lesson #476: no matter how move-in ready, your “new” house will be filled with idiosyncrasies that will eat up your time:
The tiny kitchen whose cabinets force you to learn a new way of creative storage – like putting pasta in the hall closet because the water heater is located where the pantry should be.
The bizarre electrical wiring and the loose outlets, those tramps that allow a plug to fall out in the middle of microwaving dinner, the dinner that you reluctantly microwave in your cramped, tiny kitchen.
The internal air system that kicks on once every hour to “circulate the air” and is impossible to re-program.
The beautiful fountain in the backyard…that incubates a legion of mosquito larvae.
The strange absence of outdoor activity by anyone in the neighborhood besides you and your very loud children.
The new bedding – Star Wars! (A New Hope, of course) – to unpack and put on the temporarily separated bunk beds.
All of this to eat up the precious daylight hours spent at home. Someday, I know, we will take several steps forward without an equal number of steps in the opposite direction simultaneous. On that day the empty boxes will outnumber the full, and we will resume normal family operations.
Normal for our family, I mean.