In the past few months we have collected a lovely array of appliances that are supposed to magic and soothe the baby: Ocean Wonders Aquarium Bouncy Seat. Baby Papasan Chair. Ocean Wonders Aquarium Swing. Graco Windsor Collection Stroller and Snugride Infant Car Seat. Baby Bjorn Active Carrier. We’re set – we can bounce, swing, swaddle, snuggle, and stroll. We should have a very soothed baby.
But the baby doesn’t know this, and he doesn’t care. Today he’s been impossible to put down for 5 seconds. He’s happy as a little bug when held in someone’s arms – he’ll even fall happily asleep. But if one puts him down in a crib or one of the aforementioned apparati, he screams like an enraged fan at a Notre Dame vs. USC game. (I’m projecting on him, of course.)
This has pissed me off unreasonably. Today was the first day I felt able to walk around the block in my neighborhood, and I was really looking forward to putting Kyle in the stroller and strolling. My mother accompanied us, complete with her sunshiny straw hat. We got as far as the driveway before Kyle started with the screaming. We continued the length of 2 houses, but I couldn’t take the screaming any longer, so I picked him up. He immediately calmed down.
Now I am alone in the house with Kyle – grandparents and dad have gone to a Dodger game. Currently, Kyle is hanging out in the Ocean Wonders Aquarium Bouncy Seat, with one eye open, watching me. Any second now, he will start screaming, because of course his next feeding should have happened about 20 minutes ago.
P.S. To my internet friends: keep the advice coming. You make me feel so much less alone.
Oh my, your guy sounds totally like my little girl. She also was only happy in someone’s arms for the first many months of her life. If ever she was put down she cried like the world was coming to an end. Smart babies. They know life is good in their mama’s arms. Those baby manufacturers can make all the gadgets they want, but those smart babies are not fooled. Bouncy seat. Swing. Yea, sure, it is not mama! My confession is until she was 8 months old my baby took EVERY nap in someone’s arms (mostly mine, but sometimes her daddy’s) and slept next to me in bed (as in if there was 1/8 inch between us she scooted closer!)… I read LOTS of books while she napped. I hated that she hated her stroller because I SOOOO wanted to be able to walk. My hubby would watch her and I’d walk alone. Otherwise I’d have lost my mind. Now the past couple of months she loves walking in the stroller. Who knows what changed?? The sling was my saving grace. I could put her in that, sitting up, laying down… she’d sleep or hang out and be happy and I could at least have my hands free to do a few things. I even mastered peeing with her in the sling! Crazy things we never dreamed we’d do until we became mamas! I have read many theories about the “fourth trimester” that babies go through after exiting their mamas nice cozy womb… that they are still very much comforted by womb-like conditions – being snuggled up tight, movement, hearing mamas heart beat and breathing as they are against mamas body. I promise. It will get easier. You will slowly re-claim parts of yourself and your life.
Just think – he was so comfortable in the womb and next thing he knows – BAM – aquarium bouncy seat? WHAT THE HELL WOMAN? I’d keep my eye on you, too. Who knows what stunt you adults will pull next. Space shuttle?
Seriously, he’s probably just too young to be “appreciative” of our gadgets. And we SO want to use them! Lisa’s right – it’s an adjustment period for him right now. Keep trying the devices and gradually you’ll figure out which ones work, which don’t. My youngest didn’t like the Baby Bjorn right away and now he’s okay with it. He loves the bouncy seat and for awhile would only nap in it, not the crib. But all that’s changing. Now he hates the swing, sleeps some in the seat and sleeps in his crib.
How are you with singing? I’ve found that if I combine singing with my soothing, it eventually develops into a great way to soothe them in a pinch, like when I’m making dinner or driving. I can’t hold them, but I can sing. I’m no singer, but they don’t care. It’s like they just need to know I’m aware of their unhappiness. That might buy you some free arm time. Some day. 🙂
Yes, I’m with Anne on the singing… I forgot that also often helped with my little girl when I could not hold her, such as in the car. I am a TERRIBLE singer, but she seems not to care. It doesn’t matter what you sing. I’d make up silly songs like “Little girl, Little girl, Little Baby Heather Girl, Mama Loves You, Papa Loves You…”