My Poor, Sweet Baby

I totally feel like throwing up right now. I’m so very upset, and there’s nothing I can do about the situation. I’m a fixer, and at this moment I can’t do anything. That is a nauseating prospect.

Stewart was supposed to be on his way to join me and Kyle in CT. He was due to arrive at 6:53 AM. I showered and even shaved my legs before going to bed. I whispered to Kyle that he would see his Daddy in the morning. I got myself to bed early.

And then I got a phone call that woke me at 12:45 AM. Stewart had missed his flight because the airline CHANGED THE SCHEDULE and the flight left an hour early! He was just calling to tell me he would not be on that flight, and he was trying to figure out what to do. He said the airline told him that they called my cell phone on the 11th to notify me of the schedule change. Then he had to go.

Um…WHAT?!

A. I don’t remember anyone calling me about this at all. I know I have Mommy Brain, but I certainly would not blow off THAT information.
B. They SHOULD HAVE SENT ME AN EMAIL.
C. Am I going to see my husband on Christmas? Will Kyle see his Daddy on his FIRST CHRISTMAS?

Then Stewart called me back to tell me that he was able to get on a flight…tomorrow. He won’t be here until 4:30 PM. Okay, sigh, at least he’ll be here. But his flight leaves at 7AM, and he’s not allowed into the airport itself, beyond the ticketing area, until 6 hours before the flight leaves. Meanwhile, there he is at the country’s biggest airport, 1 hour from home, with no car (he took a cab, then a bus). On a Friday night, with no recourse. I suggested he get a hotel room at an airport hotel that has a courtesy shuttle. He protested, saying that would cost too much money. He said he would figure something out, and talk to me later.

We hung up and I sobbed a little. I feel so very terrible about this. I really don’t remember a phone call about this flight. I WOULD TOTALLY REMEMBER THAT, WOULDN’T I?!?! I remain righteously indignant about the fact that they should have emailed me. So after I woke up my parents to tell them what was happening, I got online to check my emails and I remembered the following very complicated story:

A. I can check my email remotely on the web, because the mail goes to a web server.
B. However, when I log in to my email on my home computer, the program automatically downloads all emails from the server to my hard drive.
C. One day, not long after I had arrived in CT, I discovered that my Palm Pilot had died.
D. I asked Stewart to export my address book from Palm Desktop on my home computer, and email it to me.
E. I failed to specify that he should use his own email to send it to ME.
F. He logged in as ME and sent it to MY DAD, using an old, incorrect email address.
G. When I visited the web mail server, I discovered that all of the email I had read over the past few days had vanished, and there was nothing in my in-box.
H. I called Stewart, he logged off as me, logged back on as him, emailed me the file, and all was well again.
I. Except that during those few hours of him being logged on as me, emails were going directly to my home computer, therefore bypassing my remote scrutiny.
J. Oh, guess what – that was the 11th.
J. I can only deduce, now, that the airline probably emailed me during that time, and that the fateful email sits, unread, in the in-box at home.

Yes, we should have checked the flight status before Stewart even left for the airport. Yes, very smart, Ph.D.-holding Stewart could have done this for himself. But since he has found me, he rarely does such things himself anymore. He has dutiful wife/mother/cook/cleaner/laundress/seamstress/okay, no not a seamstress/business manager/clerk/personal assistant ME to handle those things. It’s not like I do all of those things all the time for him, but he relies on me to think of these things for him. It’s just an arrangement that has fallen into place over time. If you have a husband, chances are you understand. And I know this, and I should have taken care of it. It’s not a blame thing, it’s just how it is.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. I thought of a friend who lives close to the airport who would GLADLY pick Stewart up, let him crash for a few hours, and even return him to the airport in the morning. This friend is ridiculously nice to us, and I am not even sure why. His wife is in another country right now, so he’d probably be glad to have the company. So I eagerly called Stewart back with my grand solution, but his cell phone is going straight to voice mail. It’s been that way for 30 minutes now. I sit here with my stomach in knots, so sad for him, and sad for me because I have to wait almost 10 extra hours to see him again.

2:46 AM EDT UPDATE
Stewart FINALLY just called me back. He had turned off the phone because the battery is almost dead. (Why? Because I wasn’t there to charge it for him. Just kidding.) He wound up taking a hotel shuttle to a hotel and is hanging out at the bar until 1AM PDT when he will be allowed into the gate where he can sleep until it’s time to board the plane. I hurriedly explained my theory about the lost email but he told me that the airline rep said they called me on November 11 about the schedule change. Aw, HELL no. I know that’s wrong.

I’ve been keeping myself awake by browsing other people’s blogs. I found some good ones out there that aren’t my blogroll yet, but will be. And there’s one very very sad one from a mommy who found out that her father died in a car accident last night. How very awful that is. Makes me pause and realize how lucky I am. Now I will try to go back to sleep and look forward to tomorrow and a big bear hug from Stew.