I told my friend “In the game of How Many Summer Vacation Days Before Mom Loses Her Shit?, this year’s score is the number of days between the last day of school and today.”
Because:
-Back here after being home for over 3 weeks. Usually I break down right away. It takes several days for me to be able to talk to my East Coast family and friends again. Too sad, too homesick, too busy restoring my house. Laundry, putting away, acclimating to the time zone.
Ducklings with Grampa on the beaches of my childhood
But this time I hit the ground running with back-to-school preparations, PTA president that I am. It’s the butt of a joke, a thing nobody wants to do, but I’m doing it. That’s a different story. My homesickness was delayed, anyway, while I barreled through my to-do list and all the meetings.
MomHOP, my niece, and me
-PTA. Enough said. People are lovely…I just have so much to do. To be clear, this alone is not the taxing thing. It’s one of many in a perfect storm of Calgon-take-me-away.
All four cousins. Trouble.
-I got sick. I got a very bad cold that knocked me down for three days. It felt like there was a swimming pool inside my head. I called a client and asked for more time on a deadline. “I can’t string a coherent sentence together,” I told her. “I’d hate to do a less than stellar job for you.” I’ve never talked to this client before – our dealings have been completely through email before now. She was kind, at least, and appreciated my candor.
The cold lasted three days, and then the ancillary fatigue lasted another three. I thought I might have mono. I made an appointment with the doctor. But then, on the seventh day, the cloud began to lift. I canceled the appointment.
With their cousin, who calls them KyleAndBrady
-My children, left to their own devices, were going stir crazy. Calmly asking them to do something did not work. Raising my voice did not work. Raising my voice A LOT AND LOSING MY MIND finally made them pay attention.
And then I felt terrible. In the aftermath, we all cried and apologized to each other. I had a medicinal gin and tonic and went to bed early. In the morning, perspective returned.
I do all of this for the children. I take them back to my hometown and risk the heartbreak of leaving each time. I freelance so I can be home with them. I PTA so their school can thrive.
With my grandmother, everybody’s Nana
The lesson here is that I’m only human – the physical body is vulnerable, I need regular breaks, I need to cut myself some slack, and I need it from my family too.
I hired a cleaning crew to restore order to my household. I caught up on emails and made a killer to-do list (really, literally, it would probably kill a lesser woman). I stretched my back. I watched a Jon Stewart mash-up.
I feel better. Now let’s hang out.
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